The Bathroom Blunders

Don't you hate it when you have a "crappy" experience in the bathroom? I apologize for the pun, but with an entry like today's I just couldn't seem to pass it up. Anyways, today's post will focus on the unfortunate occurrences that individuals sometimes experience while in the bathroom. The first of these can strike on any given day at any given time: the non-existence of toilet paper. I know, I know...the images can be disturbing. So picture this. You finish up a long day of work/school, nothing particularly eventful happened. Just another day on the job. You go into the bathroom, park yourself on the can, grab your favorite magazine and begin to do the deed. Things are going well. You find an article about the drama in the World Series because the two starting pitchers for Game 1 had previously played for the Cleveland Indians or a cute new way to turn that old flower pot into a candle somehow. A little while has passed and the deed is almost done, so you reach for the toilet paper. But GASP, THERE IS NONE! Muahahaha, the inconsiderate family member has struck again! After he finished his extracurricular bathroom activities he decided not to reload the TP roller because dinner was burning or the commercial was over, or maybe he's just too lazy to do it. Thinking nothing of it, he tends to the meal or watches the news. You go in there and you're the new victim. Now this isn't necessarily an absolute disaster. Pending the design of your bathroom, you may be able to reach some back-up rolls under the sink or on top of the toilet. If this is the case consider yourself lucky. If this isn't feasible, there is still one clean alternative: someone else in the house brings you some toilet paper. This is a difficult process to maneuver simply because there are any number of circumstances that could be working against you. For example, no one else could be in the house, he could be in the basement, his bedroom door could be closed with him behind it, etc. If this doesn't work, you have to bite the bullet and do the unthinkable. Depending upon where the reinforcements are you may have to do some brief shuffling inside the bathroom or even worse actually leave the bathroom. You now have some unfortunate circumstances on your hands (maybe literally and figuratively). Uh, nasty. I think most of us can imagine what happens next so I'll leave it for you to create your own ending. Regardless of how this situation ends, it could definitely be worse. For example, you could be at a guest's house. How terrible would that be? That is just a terribly unfortunate situation. If they have extra rolls in the bathroom it's not too bad, but if they don't what would you even do? I like to consider myself to be a pretty creative person, but I wouldn't even know where to begin solving that predicament. This can also be a problem if you're in a public restroom. Wow.

An additional bathroom blunder that isn't nearly as bad but still annoying has to do with bar soap. I don't know how many of you use bars of soap but at my house we use them. With that being said, it will be easier for those bar soap users out there to relate to this problem. Don't you just hate it when you're already in the shower and you notice the only soap around is the tiny smidgen? Not only is this slice of soap small, but it's usually slimy and probably has some hair mashed into it. This is a pretty unfortunate situation. Not nearly as bad as the one I previously discussed, but still annoying. You have three primary options at this point. They are, in no particular order, 1) get out of the shower to retrieve new bar and potentially drench bathroom/hallway, 2) use shampoo or other product to wash body, and finally 3) use slimy soap. Ouch. Depending on the situation I'm not quite sure what I'd do. Hopefully you'll not need to make that decision.

With that being said I'd like to thank my dad for the idea behind this entry. He randomly called me one day last week with this idea for the blog. Thanks Dad.

Until next time,

Zac